Are Your Practice Habits Erratic?

Bad practice habits? "You need to be practicing at least an hour every day!" That's not an unfamiliar admonition to many of us. It's not uncommon to hear those words coming from a piano teacher's mouth. Once heard by parents, a little kid whose practice habits are erratic will likely hear it from them on a regular basis , too. Does it work? Not usually. Along with that way of thinking goes along the belief that there's a right way and a wrong way to do things - and nothing in between. Either the kid does what he or she is told or they're going about it all wrong. That's counterproductive. Am I saying that there's something wrong with encouraging a youngster to practice an hour a day? Certainly not. If the kid is self-inspired, you could probably expect a whole lot more. But if you're going to use fear as a motivating factor, you're in for major disappointment.

Practice Habits Vary

However, if the motivation is external and has a negative tone (which it often does), then don't expect the results to be positive. It may get temporary results. But some habits die hard. Even if you get the little "maestro-to-be" to do what you say, the reason for sitting and tickling those ivories is yours than theirs. Hmmmm. In the long term, that can really have some negative effects. I remember what it was like to be threatened with the all-powerful ultimatum, "You either get in there right now and practice for a half hour or your lessons will stop this week!" I have to admit that there was something attractive about that deal. After all, no more lessons would mean no more of that negotiating. No more HAVING to practice against my will. It would be a whole lot easier to not have any more of those expectations and just turn on the television set for my daily dose of passive entertainment. However, in my case, that would also mean that I wouldn't see my piano teacher once a week. What was it about his potential absence that compelled me to run to that piano upon getting yelled at?

Be A Hero To Your Kid - And Yourself

Well, in a very big way, he was my hero. Sure, there were times that he would point his finger at me and raise his voice about the practicing, but that was done in front of my parents for their benefit. I knew that his intensity would quickly fade and he would go back to being himself. You see, this guy accepted me no matter what. Each and every week, he would smile and laugh with me. He would listen to me play through the lesson material, offer some feedback, and then assign me something new. But his 100% acceptance of me kept me wanting those lessons. I've reflected on those times many, many times. There was a lot of insightful food for thought contained within those episodes. I always made it a point to incorporate what I learned from those experiences into my own efforts as a piano teacher. My practice habits were totally erratic. My parents' usual reprimanding approach never really took. But, as the months and years progressed, they recognized that I really had the ability to play and sound good. So, they let up on those demands.

Success Can't Be Forced

If you have a youngster whose practice habits are erratic, consider not trying to mold his or her habits in a manner that fits what you believe to be right. Instead, it might be of greater value to recognize that erraticism as a sign of creativity. When they do go to the piano on their own, express appreciation for that and pay compliments to the efforts made. Doing so will prove to be  whole lot more effective. As an adult learner, offer yourself the same kind of compassion. You don't need to live up to anyone else's standards. Learn to love yourself and love your time making music. Do this while remaining free of judgement. Immerse yourself into what you are doing when you choose to do it. This will lend itself toward your wanting to do it more often - and better! So strongly do I want you to get this message. Having fun being engaged with something and enjoying progress with it should not be conditional on adhering to terms imposed by others by any means.

Nurture The Artist Within

Some people eat according to a rigid plan. They eat three square meals a day and they look to the clock for approval. If that works for them, fine. However, the people who do not subscribe to such a routine still eat and make their way through the day well-nourished just fine. They listen to their bodies. When hungry, they eat. Artists paint (or play their instrument) when inspired, never needing or wanting outside influences. Receiving appreciation for their results always feels great. That may even contribute to their wanting to create more. See yourself as such an artist. As a parent, see your child that way. Expressed appreciation goes a long way, as does the freedom for such expression.